I only wanted to fit in,

to be like all the others,

to be liked,

to be popular,

not so popular that I stood out,

rather I wanted to blend in well,

not too rich,

not too poor,

getting along,

enough to eat,

but definitely to be where the action is,

to be in the know,

maybe that’s what drew me there that day,

the day of the controversial parade,

the day that I and other cried, save me, save us…

we waved palm branches, we threw our cloaks on the ground,

such jubilation….

+

I only wanted to fit in,

to be like others,

to be liked,

to be popular…

you get the picture….

maybe, that’s why when the rumours started

I found myself amongst the crowds again,

this time the cries of save us,

had turned to crucify,

crucify, yes I cried out crucify…

how the memory pains me now….

+

I followed too, joined the crowd

thronging the streets,

creating a strange honour guard all the way to Golgotha…

some spat at him,

the one they’d hailed only days before,

some, like me were both entranced and repulsed by the spectale

of this beaten bloodied man

placing one foot after another….

+

I slunk away soon after,

some say a woman wiped his face,

some say another was made to carry the cross as he was too weak,

but I could bear no more….

+

crucify, the word sticks in my mouth like bitter gall,

he was crucified,

some watched right to the end,

they say his last words were

it is finished,

as if he had accomplished something,

something …

+

it is finished,

the words haunt me now,

what is finished…..

what may have begun?