It is 2016, the 1st January 2016, the day is grey and dull, like yesterday, I still have a cough and cold, like yesterday, and yet I am aware that today I stand on the threshold of something new. My Facebookfeed is full of greetings and hopes, and wishes, something old has been put behind us and the new has just begun, we are standing on the very edge of it.
I explained yesterday why I spent New Year’s Eve alone, and I have not regretted it, if Iam honest I think it is the first time in my recent memory that the time passed with no unrealistic dreams or expectations, I was simply able to let it be, and to be in the moment. I lit a candle just after midnight as a prayer, and that candle illuminated one of my Nativity Sets and I was reminded of the words of the Carol “Oh little town of Bethlehem”;
The hopes and fears of all the years are met in thee tonight…
What a burden that would be should it be anyone but Godself who were asked to carry it, and the story struck me afresh, in the Christchild, frail, vulnerable and poor, emptied of all but love lay the hopes, dreams and fears of the whole of the world. I wonder, did creations groaning pause at the point of the angels song to join in the song of hope? Is that what we did last night as hopes and dreams were shared with friends present and by social media, text and email? Did we pause long enough to join in with Mary’s aquience to the Angel Gabriel “Let it be to me according to your word”, let it be….?
New Year is always filled with determined resolutions, from the simple externals like loosing wieght and becoming more fit and healthy to the deeper and profound groaning for change that comes from the well of our souls longings. This year I have recognised that longing afresh, but I dare not add to that my own strength and determination, I am content instead to turn (or return ) the Christ who comes now risen and yet with nail scared hands, to plce my hand into his and allow for the leading of the Spirit, my prayer can only be, let it be….
My prayer can only be; Let your glory shine wherever life leads me, through deep valleys, over high peaks, of on dull apparently ordinary days such as today. Help me to see that glory in life’s unexpected surprises, to mine treasure in the darkness as well as in the light. Help me to let go in the sense of allowing you to grow me and to groan in me the longing for a more connected, more whole and more authentic life.
Let it be, let it be….. ( this is my New Years resolution)